The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Randomize