apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
i need some magic done to my vagina
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize