my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Randomize
