she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
Randomize
