How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
