awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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