I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
