I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
