it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I think i got beer on your cat.
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