take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
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