if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
