thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
