Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
Randomize
