well most of my day revolves around power hour
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
