guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
