So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Randomize
