i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
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