kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Randomize