i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
