that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
