i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Randomize