I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Quick, to the slutcave!
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Randomize
