She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
