love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Randomize
