Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
