I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize