What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
