hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
