I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
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