I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
can u get pink eye on your cock?
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Randomize
