I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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