Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Randomize
