You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Randomize
