Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
