Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize