It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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