your room smells of hookers.
And success
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
