dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Randomize
