She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Randomize
