everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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