she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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