would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
