So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Randomize