real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
it glows. i had to have it.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
