He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Randomize
