As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
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