Fine. I'll sleep in my office
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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