How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I wish you could order shots online.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Randomize
