Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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