She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
