My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
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